(Why am I naming days?)
9/15/14, Day 14,013 (Mercena Day 31): Mercena’s First Month
I have a much longer post in me about this first month, but, per baby-usual, not enough time in which to write it. So I’ll just focus on the day itself, which began with a surprisingly successful visit to our pediatrician, Dr. Gocs.
First, the stats: she’s now 10 pounds, 6 ounces, which means she’s growing well (which we already knew from our tired arms). She also impressed with her tummy time skills, and miraculously did not freak out when we needed to change her. She got through her first Hep B shot with the help of a feeding session, and was peaceful as we took the beautiful walk home (Forest Hills really is crazy pretty).
One thing I love about Dr. Gocs: there’s no coddling parents about the difficulties of a new baby. That’s not to say she’s rough or cold–she’s not–but she also doesn’t indulge the various concerns we have about Mercena’s totally normal baby behaviors (aka, crying when changed). She’s clear on what things we should be concerned about, and what is just part of the deal.
I really appreciate that, because when people are overly sympathetic about our often fussy baby it makes me worried there’s something wrong to be sympathetic about, beyond the general challenges of a new baby…and that makes me worried and anxious. This is what we signed up for; and while its often hard, it’s always a gift for which I’m deeply grateful. As we sometimes say at TCG about the challenges of our Diversity & Inclusion programming, This Is The Work.
Keeping both gratitude and a a lack of self-pity as my primary frames makes me a happier, more relaxed (and therefore more effective) parent; and I’m grateful her doctor provides that clear perspective on what’s actually worth our worry.
We also had a visit from our birthing class friend Liz and her 3-month old Otto, and shared birthing and child-rearing stories and strategies. She’s adopted a much more rigorous schedule than we’re currently trying (we’re adopting more of a pattern before evolving into a schedule), but it was helpful to hear her particular journey to a baby that mostly sleeps through the night.
Oh, and speaking of that: while we had some serious fussy patches yesterday, the pattern appears to have paid off, because she slept much better in the night and has even become more relaxed about her changes. Please pray to whatever Gods you have, secular or divine, that this more relaxed diaper-change mood holds!
I also had the opportunity to attend the initial Mission to dit(MARS)’ Propulsion Lab meeting, while Heather Google Hanged her way into the Flux Family Feud meeting.
I wasn’t sure I’d be able to attend the launch of this year’s Propulsion Lab, but Heather and Mercena gave me that last minute go and away I went. I’m particularly excited by this year’s group, which has many playwrights whose work I already admire as well as some playwrights who are completely new to me.
A Year Ago Today: We celebrated the marriage of my sister Marnie to my wonderful brother-in-law Zack. It was a beautiful ceremony marked by the maturity of a couple that had been with each other long enough to really understand the commitment they were making; and, of course, by their shared love of games. I’m still grateful I didn’t mess up the gorgeous three-part harmony of At Last my father had written to sing with my brother and I at the ceremony…
5 Years Ago Today: Heather and Candice have a meeting to discuss the crazy role of One in The Lesser Seductions of History.
Technique never stands still: it only advances or retreats…
Writing: 144 out of 181 days (rewrites of KD and The Band)
Spanish: 131 out of 181 days
Music: 49 out of 87 days
What small things did I do yesterday to help build the Honeycomb?
(And what does it mean to “Help build the honeycomb?”)
- Ate and cooked local, organic, vegetarian food, and used cloth diapers for Mercena;
- Asked the EPA to activate the Clean Air Act’s “Bhopal” provision to lower risk of chemical leaks;
- Asked advertisers to pull their ads from Limbaugh’s programming after his “no means yes” rape comments;
- Asked the Forest Service to not grant right-of-way to developers trampling on the water rights of the Havasupai Tribe.